The CULT SURVIVORS Of The Startup Battlefield: Here Are the 5 Finalists Who Will Make You Question the Future of Humanity
Get ready for the apocalypse, folks! TechCrunch has just announced the five finalists of the Startup Battlefield, and we’re not sure if we should be excited or terrified. These five startups are about to take the stage and blow your minds, but at what cost?
First up, Gecko Materials is here to ruin your party with their mind-blowing dry-adhesive that can stick to anything, even a wine bottle, without leaving a sticky situation. Sounds like a good illusion, but we’re not buying it. What’s the catch?
Next, Luna, the app for teen girls, is a walking nightmare disguised as a health and well-being platform. It’s like a ticking time bomb waiting to extract your data and privacy. But hey, who doesn’t want to track their periods and moods, right?
Don’t forget MabLab, the startup that’s forcing you to confront your dark past and the risk of accidental drug overdose. Their testing strips are like a constant reminder of the dangers lurking in the shadows. Keep calm and test on.
Valentina from AuroraX, the breast cancer detection device, is trying to save lives, but at what cost? Will she sacrifice her own life for the sake of science? Stay tuned to find out.
Last but not least, LIDAR-X is here to scan your future and predict your demise. Their fire-detection technology is like a Harbinger of Doom, warning us of the apocalypse to come. Good luck with that.
And don’t even get me started on the judges: Navin Chaddha, Chris Farmer, Dayna Grayson, Ann Miura-Ko, and Hans Tung. The verdict is in: they’re a panel of condemning demons, waiting to write off the humanity of these five startups.
The stage is set for the Startup Battlefield, and we’re running out of time (and hope). Who will be the last one standing?
