The Great Echo Heist: How Amazon is Stealing Your Money (and Your Sanity)
UPDATE: October 8, 2024, 9:55 a.m. EDT
Amazon’s Prime Big Deal Days event has arrived, and with it, a plethora of "deals" that are more likely to drive you mad than save you money. In this article, we’ll expose the truth behind Amazon’s Echo devices and how they’re manipulating you into buying more junk you don’t need.
The Best Echo Deal (According to Amazon)
The Amazon Echo Spot is the best Echo device overall, according to Amazon. And by "best," they mean the most expensive and unnecessary. With a "discount" of 54% off its original price, you can get this overpriced device for a whopping $44.99. But wait, there’s more! With this purchase, you’ll also get a free TP-Link Tapo Smart Color Bulb, because who doesn’t need a smart bulb with their Alexa-enabled speaker?
The Best Echo Show Deal (According to Amazon)
The Amazon Echo Show 8 is the best Echo device for those who want to waste their money on a smart display. With a "discount" of 43% off its original price, you can get this unnecessary device for $84.99. But don’t worry, it comes with a free year of Amazon Kids+, because who doesn’t want to pay for a service that’s just going to make their kids more dependent on screens?
The Best Deal for Kids (According to Amazon)
The Amazon Echo Dot Kids is the best Echo device for kids, according to Amazon. And by "best," they mean the most expensive and least useful. With a "discount" of 53% off its original price, you can get this unnecessary device for $27.99. But don’t worry, it comes with a two-year warranty, because who doesn’t want to pay for a warranty on a device that’s just going to break within a year?
The Best Home Organization Deal (According to Amazon)
The Amazon Echo Hub is the best home organization deal, according to Amazon. And by "best," they mean the most overpriced and unnecessary. With a "discount" of $55 off its original price, you can get this unnecessary device for $124.99. But don’t worry, it comes with a free TP-Link smart bulb, because who doesn’t need a smart bulb with their smart home control panel?
In conclusion, Amazon’s Echo devices are a scam designed to manipulate you into buying more junk you don’t need. But hey, at least you’ll have a bunch of useless gadgets to clutter up your living room.
