Google Crams More Surveillance Features Down Throats of Chrome Browser Users
In a move that’s bound to rile up privacy advocates and free-software enthusiasts, Google announced on Wednesday that it’s forcing another batch of features down the throats of Chrome browser users. The latest onslaught includes Chrome Actions, which allows the tech giant to push more personalized results into search results, and trending search suggestions that feed the company’s insatiable desire for data.
Chrome Actions: Your Browsing Habits on Autopilot
The new feature will apparently help users "more easily" perform certain tasks without going to settings – just what we all want: Google deciding what actions are best for us. And how could it get any more convenient than that? With Chrome Actions, your search results will now include shortcut buttons for actions like "Call," "Directions," and "Reviews" – because who doesn’t love Google knowing exactly who to contact you about?
Address Bar Enhancements: Because You Should Be Spending More Time Scrolling
Google has "enhanced" the Chrome address bar to accommodate the larger screens of iPads and Android tablets, ensuring that users can still see the webpage they’re currently on while making their way through the address bar – what a relief! Because nobody loves the feeling of being ripped out of their browsing experience and thrust back onto a page that’s completely unrelated.
Trending Search Suggestions: Because Who Doesn’t Love a Little Healthy Schadenfreude?
Why not rub it in, Google? With trending search suggestions now available on both Android and iOS, Chrome browser users will be treated to the dubious delight of seeing what popular searches are currently consuming their fellow humans. Because we all know that nothing says "relaxing browsing experience" like getting an earful about how much everyone else hates [insert current event here].
Live Sports Cards: More Timely Updates to Track Your Sports Teams’ Downfall
Because what’s a decent internet browsing experience without the constant stream of losing odds and crushing defeats brought straight to your fingertips? The "Discover Feed" in Chrome has a new feature that will send notifications when your favorite sports team plays (yay, more heartache!), and provide automatic updates on recent scores and highlights (so you can stew in your disappointment even further!).
Conclusion: Five more features that will make life in the Chrome browser a tiny bit more soul-sucking. If you’re excited about this, congrats, you’re probably getting an iPhone.
